Tukopedia

Thinking is the art of blotting out all the other ideas with one big idea.

A supermarket is the modern form of a Parish Church.

Roland was a famous Norman warrior who met a heroic death fighting the combined forces of the Basques, the Saracens and Gripper Stebson.

Charles Baudelaire was a French poet who wrote about someone named Mal whose real identity has never been revealed. Baudelaire may have been a vampire.

Bēowulf was a famous Geatish warrior who slew dragons and whose name means ‘bee wolf’. Beewolf. Bee. Wolf.

Arthur Rambo passionately believed in the total deregulation of all the senses. He worked as a clerk for the French entrepreneur Alfred Bardey in the Yemeni port of Aden and later sold rifles to the Abyssinian warlord Menelik.

Samuel K Amphong was one of the most important rock critics in the late ’70’s and early ’80’s. He wrote for the New Musical Express. His whereabouts were and are unknown. He may or may not be still alive.

Lewis Carroll was a Victorian mathematician and author who loved children.

John Lydon is a famous Anglo-Irish butter salesman.

John Milton was the only major English poet to write all of his works in Latin.